7 Ways To Argue Without Destroying Your Marriage

                       



Arguments are a regular occurrence in life, love and marriage. They give you an insight into your partner’s perspective and help to build understanding upon resolution.

The line must however be drawn at verbal arguments. Under no circumstances should arguments degenerate into the use of physical force.

In this article, we explore the essential ways you can turn your arguments into positive conversations that will strengthen your relationship.

Go to the root
The first thing to do in an argument is to find the root cause of the argument. There is always something behind your irritation or disgust.

Without this process of looking inward, there will be no resolution of the argument. In place of resolution, irrelevancies and words calculated to hurt will be continuously thrown around.

Mind your language 
Always remember that your words cannot be withdrawn once they have been spoken. The need to put your point across should not lead to you to hurt your partner emotionally.

Don’t  say things like ‘You were never good enough for me’ or ‘You would always be a disappointment’ . Even though you may not mean these words, the damage they would cause  can prove irreparable.

Keep it down
Keeping your voice down allows you to manage your emotions and express yourself properly. Apart from your voice, the tone with which you express your views is also important.

Your tone should never be accusatory or insulting. With a voice and accompanying tone that allows for communication, issues will be resolved quicker.

Don’t open old wounds
Revisiting previous arguments and past events is a strategy used to avoid discussing the present circumstances. Opening up old wounds will only serve to distract you and prolong the argument.

You and your spouse should resolve to understand the problem at hand and solve it before moving on to other issues.

Let each other talk 
A key to resolving any argument is to let both parties express their views without being interrupted. Listening should also accompany the absence of interruption for the best results.

This shows that you respect the opinion of your spouse and a willingness to see from their perspective.

Compromise
At a point, both of you would have to compromise and find common ground amidst your conflicting opinions. No matter how strongly you may feel about the issue, remember that peace and happiness in your marriage is the ultimate goal.

Apologize 
A heartfelt apology will melt the coldest of hearts and pave the way for the settlement of conflict. Most times an apology means that you have to be the bigger person and let go of your assertions and views.

After you apologize, be sure to reassure your spouse of your love and total commitment to making your marriage work.